A commentator has branded Melbourne ‘ugly’ and claimed its biggest strength is its pubs in a scathing takedown. 

Betoota Advocate editor Clancy Overell said Victoria’s capital had ‘lost their spark and everyone can see it except for them’. 

‘Poor old Melbourne really hasn’t recovered from those lockdowns have they,’ he wrote on LinkedIn.

‘When your city is actually that ugly, you kind of need a thriving nightlife to make up for the fact you don’t have a Harbour or beach.

‘Even the majestic Brown Snake that winds and sparkles its way through Brisbane city is an asset to the Queensland economy, despite the fact that it is extremely tidal and floods like every five years.

‘But what’s Melbourne got going for it nowadays? A comedy festival that prioritises the niche-est subcultures that ever existed on Smith Street? 

‘A flash casino? I don’t even think they claim they have the best coffee anymore.’

Overell conceded Melbourne’s ‘pubs are alright’, but claimed this positive was ‘a sign of a cultural deficit’.

Melbourne was branded ‘ugly’ in a scathing commentary (stock)

 The editor of satirical Betoota Advocate said Victoria’s capital had ‘lost their spark (stock)

The editor claimed the city is full with ‘for lease’ signs due to hospitality owners going out of business.

‘The “Most Livable City” is haemorrhaging the cultural capital that they once boasted after decades of masterfully navigating the intersection of sport, arts and dining,’ he added.

In the satirical post, the editor argued immigration ‘from Greece or Italy’ should be encouraged to help the city and stated it should focus on improving its nightlife.

Overell made it clear he was only criticising Melbourne and praised regional Victoria.

Victorian PR executive Felicia Coco agreed: ‘As a born and raised Melbournian you pretty much nailed this and ngl it’s sad. 

‘Idk maybe if we keep taxing small biz to death it will get better?

‘But one thing we do have going for us is the burgeoning tag/s***graff movement.. it’s giving halfway-house core. Vacant-and-vandalised is the new booked-and-busy.’   

Another added: ‘Tbf, the squeeze on hospitality, live music, and culture at large is real. And I’ve often found myself suffering the same lament.’

However, others jumped into defend Melbourne, with one commenting: ‘It is sad to see non Victorians trying so hard to insult Melbourne. Even satirically, they just don’t get how cool we are…’

Taking aim at Sydney, one wrote: ‘Funnily enough though, once or twice a year I suddenly feel rejuvenated about it all. Because I have to travel to Sydney. 

‘Go for a walk after 9PM and it might as well be one of those docos called “AFTER THE COLLAPSE” or something where they predict what the world will look like without humans.’

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