The Barefoot Investor has slammed a mother for continuously helping her son crawl out of debt and claimed she has robbed him of the chance to grow up.
Distraught mum Helen wrote to Scott Pape claiming her son was a ‘financial disaster’.
She explained she has paid off countless loans of his to ‘keep him afloat’, but now a consultant has advised him to borrow even more money from his family to pay his debts so that he could ‘start again’.
‘For eight years, I’ve been his safety net,’ Helen wrote in a column for the Daily Telegraph.
‘I’m emotionally exhausted, financially drained, and now he’s asking me to take out a loan in my name.’
The mother, who is in her 60s, begged the Barefoot Investor for advice on how to help her son without sacrificing her own financial, emotional and mental health.
‘I can’t keep doing this. Please – how do I help him without sacrificing myself?’ Helen wrote.
In his reply, Mr Pape said she would not like his response – adding he did not even like his own response but was going to give it to her anyway.
Distraught mum Helen, aged in her 60s, explained had been paying off her adult son’s loans for the past eight years and he has yet again asked to borrow more money (stock image)
‘Helen, you are failing as a mum,’ Mr Pape wrote.
‘By continually bailing him out for the past eight years you’ve robbed him of the chance to grow up. Worse, you’ve put your own financial future in jeopardy doing it!’
Mr Pape advised Helen to inform her son that the ‘Bank of Mum’ was officially closed and that she could not take out a loan or lend him any more money.
He added she needed to stop rescuing him from his money troubles as it would be detrimental to his life and recommended he call free financial counsellors for help.
‘No exceptions. “No” is a complete sentence,’ Mr Pape wrote.
‘If you keep rescuing him, he’ll end up being a 50 year old flailing around with his financial floaties on, waiting for his mummy to rescue him from the shallow end of life.
‘Suggest that he call a free financial counsellor via the National Debt Helpline (1800 007 007), and that they’ll help him sort out his mess.
‘You’re a kind woman, and a loving mum. But right now Helen, you’re killing him with kindness.’
Data has shown the Bank of Mum and Dad has seen a shift from helping loved ones purchase their first property to assisting with everyday living expenses amid the cost of living crisis.
Global financial services company UBS surveyed 1,000 adults and found roughly half had received money from or had given money to family members in the past year.
In his reply, Scott Pape (pictured) said Helen was ‘failing as a mum’ and admonished her to stop giving her son any more money
The data, released in January this year, revealed the most common form of financial aid – usually provided by parents – was helping with cash payments.
The majority of funds given to adult children from their parents or their grandparents was used on everyday living expenses including insurance, petrol, bills and groceries.
The second most common use of family-provided funds was for mortgage interest payments followed by helping a family member to purchase a home.
Of those surveyed who were given financial assistance from a family member, 70 per cent said they received cash from their parents for housing and living expenses.
Meanwhile, 15 per cent said they received money from their grandparents to help cover their bills.
The research also found the total amount of financial gifts had increased with most exceeding $100,000, while some were even above $200,000.
