A mother who found the strength to live on after the triple homicide of her children and the sudden death of her last surviving child revealed she has turned her home into a shrine to them.
Shirley Singh lost three of her children – 24-year-old Neelma, 18-year-old Kunal and 12-year-old Sidhi – after Neelma’s ex-boyfriend killed them inside the family’s Brisbane home in Bridgeman Downs in April, 2003.
Mrs Singh said she holds onto the happy memories she had with her children but admitted her biggest regret was not cuddling her youngest daughter, Sidhi, enough.
‘One day I said to her “can you leave me alone?”, I regret saying that. I tell parents, “don’t say that” because she’s left me for good,’ she told A Current Affair on Friday.
Mrs Singh still lives in the home where the murders unfolded alongside her estranged husband, Vijay, as housemates.
Shirley Singh (above) revealed how she stayed strong after three of her children – 24-year-old Neelma, 18-year-old Kunal and 12-year-old Sidhi – were murdered in April, 2003
Mrs Singh still lives in the family’s Brisbane home, the scene of the grisly murders (pictured, Mrs Singh with her husband Vijay and only surviving child Archana at press conference a week after the murders. Archana has since died of a brain aneurysm)
Photos from her children’s lives fill the home and specialised shrines mark key points of the horrific murders, including the spa bath where they were left, and their childhoods.
Every night Mrs Singh tucks photos of her children into bed and every morning she wakes them.
‘I will talk to them and think about all the happy memories,’ she said.
‘I say good morning to them, I kiss them. I feel as if they’re still there with me. Call me silly but this is how I live.’
A memorial in the family’s living room shows photos of all four of Mrs Singh’s children and the ages they would have turned if they were still with her.
This year, Neelma would have been 44, Kunal 38, Sidhi 32 and Archana ‘Sonia’ Pathik – the only child to survive the attack who passed of a brain aneurysm in Melbourne three years ago – would be 46.
Mrs Singh released her book, Shirley’s Story, on the twentieth anniversary of her children’s murder.
She said she hopes to help others struggling with grief realise their own strength.
‘Don’t become anyone’s victim, put your head up and fight,’ she said.
The book was written by her close friend’s daughter and former journalist Emily Eklund Power and released on Thursday.
Mrs Singh said she tucks photos of her four children into bed every night and wakes them every morning (pictured, Mrs Singh with the photos)
Neelma (left), Kunal (centre) and Sidhi (right) were killed by Neelma’s ex-boyfriend Massimo ‘Max’ Sica on Easter weekend in 2003
Both Mrs Singh and Ms Power said through writing the book they found a disturbing pattern of abuse in Neelma’s relationship with her ex-boyfriend and killer, Massimo ‘Max’ Sica.
Sica killed Neelma, Kunal and Sidhi on Easter Sunday in 2003.
After cruelly murdering them, he disposed of their bodies in the master bedroom spa bath and called triple-zero, pretending to have discovered them there.
It took police five-and-a-half years to gather enough evidence to take Sica to trial and almost a decade for him to be sentenced.
Neelma and Sica met as neighbours before she moved to Dubai to become an Emirates air hostess in early 2002.
While she was in Dubai, Neelma was using a laptop Sica had set-up with spyware so he could monitor her and was often subject to loyalty ‘tests’ by him.
Neelma had decided to return to Brisbane in May, 2002, after she was attacked by a female roommate in Dubai but instead of going to her family, she moved in with Sica.
However, she fled back to her family six weeks later after seeing a dark side to the future killer.
Sica was still legally married to another woman, was considerably older than Neelma at 33 years, had previously spent time in jail and told Neelma about his plans to kidnap a businessman to hold at ransom.
Mrs Singh has written a book about how she dealt with the grief of losing her children which was published on Thursday (pictured, Mrs Singh, right, her close friend, centre, and her friend’s daughter and former journalist Emily Eklund Power, left)
Sica (above) had a controlling and abusive relationship with Neelma before he murdered her and two of her siblings on April 22, 2003
After Neelma broke up with him, Sica anonymously emailed naked photos of her to her friends and family.
Finally, Sica told Neelma he had been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumour and had only a few weeks left to live.
Feeling sorry for him, Neelma invited him over to spend time with her while her parents were away in Fiji for a wedding on April 22, 2003.
‘Something happened in Neelma’s bedroom between the two of you,’ Justice John Byrne told Sica during his 2012 sentencing.
‘Enraged by jealousy most likely, you strangled Neelma with both hands, using sustained pressure for about a minute, intending to kill her.
‘To ensure that Kunal and Sidhi would not tell that you had murdered Neelma, you murdered them too.
‘You put your victims into the spa bath in the master bedroom ensuite.
‘Your savage attack on Kunal had rendered him unconscious. He drowned after you filled the bath with water and covered the three bodies with bedding.
‘These are brutal, horrific crimes – in the worst categories of murder.’
Sica was sentenced to a minimum of 35 years in jail.
Mrs Singh said her children were left so disfigured by the attack that she could hardly recognise them.
In 2012, Sica was sentenced for killing Neelma then her siblings to hide the murder and leaving their bodies in the family’s spa bath (pictured, photos of Neelma, Kunal and Sidhi)
Mrs Singh said she still lives her life as though her children are with her, even celebrating their birthdays (pictured, Mrs Singh, her husband Vijay and daughter Archana at the children’s funeral in 2003)
But she chooses to focus on the happy days with her children and continues to make memories with them.
‘Archana’s room, Neelma’s room and Sidhi’s room are always open,’ she told the Courier Mail, explaining her son Kunal had joked about wanting more privacy so she still makes sure to knock before going into his room.
On special occasions, she brings Kunal a beer and Vodka Cruisers to her girls.
‘If it’s a spiritual day, I do offerings, I dress them up with flowers. I’ve got a candle I’ve been lighting ever since I lost my children,’ she said.
