A woman has revealed the moment men ‘interrogate’ her about her relationship even after telling them she had a boyfriend.
Mary Johnson, 27, was at a shopping centre in Milton Keynes waiting for a friend when she was approached by a man she’d never met before telling her she is ‘gorgeous’.
The student said she felt ‘uncomfortable’ as she was on her own and tried to reject him by using the excuse that she ‘had a man’ in an effort to be polite.
In video footage, filmed secretly on her phone, the persistent stranger asks questions including ‘how long have you been together for?’ to try and catch her out.
While the student nurse is single, she admits she used the excuse as a tactic to kindly reject him as she feared it could ‘turn nasty’ if she bluntly ‘shut it down’.
Mary Johnson (pictured) was minding her own business at a Milton Keynes shopping centre when she was approached and had hoped to let her questioner down gently by saying she had a boyfriend
However, the ‘shameless man proceeded to interrogate the 27-year-old singleton with questions like, ‘how long have you been together for?’
The student has encouraged other women to covertly record their own similar interactions after her encounter left her feeling ‘fed up’
The encounter left her feeling ‘fed up’ as she wanted to be ‘left alone’ and now she hopes to encourage men to be more aware of women’s boundaries – even if they find someone ‘attractive’.
Mary posted the video online with the caption: ‘So guys are out here now investigating if you actually have a boyfriend or not… Some men have no shame.
‘They just can’t take no for an answer [crying emoji] whether you’re being polite or rude about it. We can never win.’
Mary, from Luton, Bedfordshire, said: ‘I saw him walk past and look at me when I was on my phone.
‘I saw him go into the shops behind me where I was sitting. The next thing you know he was just right in front of me.
‘He said, “you’re gorgeous, do you have a man?”
‘I felt uncomfortable. I don’t really like it, especially if I’m on my own in the middle of a shopping centre, so I said, “yeah I do”.
‘I felt like it was a kind way of rejecting him. I thought I’ll just try to be nice.
‘That’s when he started questioning me saying, “well how long have you been together?” and this and that.
‘He didn’t believe me that I had a boyfriend.
‘I said, “you’re really interested in my relationship aren’t you?” and he said, “nowadays girls lie about having a man”.
‘I was getting fed up because I was trying to be nice and well mannered. But then I started to get anxious, I just wanted to leave. He was just so reluctant [to accept it] and persistent.
‘Clearly there’s a reason. Why do you have to interrogate? Just leave us alone.
‘I have encountered this a lot and I always get scared because there was one time in the past where I shut it down and the person became really nasty.
‘As a girl it’s quite terrifying as you just don’t know how they’re going to react.’
Mary said that she has been in similar situations a lot in the past and still struggles to know how to approach them as ‘one time in the past where I shut it down and the person became really nasty’
Commenters, as well as Mary’s friends in real life, expressed their sympathies after she shared the clip
Mary suspects that the ‘interrogation’ she faced was perhaps due to other women using similar excuses in the past.
Feeling anxious, she was relieved when her friend came to meet her but says she has faced similar situations in the past, even claiming that one man asked her to pull over on the motorway to get her number.
Mary said: ‘It can be really dangerous. I’m still trying to figure out how to approach that kind of situation. You never know how people might react, it completely depends on the person.
‘There was a time I was driving to work and this guy was flashing [his lights at] me, so I thought there was something wrong with my car.
‘He was flashing and pointing his hand like ‘Go to the hard shoulder’.
‘I genuinely thought there was something wrong with my car because I’m not good with cars at all.
‘I went to the hard shoulder and he was like: “Can I get your number?”
‘I had to give him my social media because I was scared that if I were to reject him and get back in the car, he’d try and intimidate me driving and I could crash.
‘It was terrifying. As soon as I reached my work place, I blocked him and changed my username.’
Mary hopes that by sharing her videos online she will encourage other women to secretly record a conversation if they feel unsafe and also help to educate men on accepting women’s boundaries.
Lastly, she implored men to ‘just know the boundaries’ regardless of whether they find someone attractive
Mary said: ‘Sometimes you just want to go shopping on your own with your headphones on without being approached.
‘It’s totally shameless and all women experience it.,’ she said. ‘Even talking to my male friends they were like, “I didn’t realise it was to that extent”.
‘My advice to other women would be to slyly video like I did if you find yourself in a similar situation.
‘I’ve seen videos where they whack it out and show guys faces but that can trigger them to get aggressive.
‘Do it more as a protection thing just so that if it does turn left, you have evidence. You could quickly show their face at the end of the video.
‘Don’t knock yourself on how you react in the situation either, just do whatever will make you feel safe and protected.
‘For guys, even though you find someone attractive, just know the boundaries.’
