Willie Kirk takes a deep breath before explaining how he became involved in a relationship with one of his players while he was manager of Leicester City.
It has been six weeks since Kirk was sacked by the club after the relationship, which he is still in, was discovered. His dismissal triggered widespread debate – is it ever ok for a manager and a player to cross that line?
Kirk is not the first coach in the women’s game to have done so. Mail Sport knows of several current and former managers who have had relationships with their players. Most are not reportable for legal reasons.
Kirk has stayed silent since his sacking in March, but now he is ready to talk.
Speaking exclusively to Mail Sport from his house in Nottinghamshire, Kirk says he wants to take accountability for his actions. But he also wants to set the record straight.
Willie Kirk was sacked from his role at Leicester after it was revealed he was in a relationship with a current player
The former WSL manager is keen to take accountability – as well as to set the record straight
Debate swirled over Kirk’s dismissal in March over whether a player and coach should ever cross the line – there is no suggestion any of the group pictured here were the player to have a relationship with the manager
‘There’s a number of things I need to get off my chest,’ Kirk says. ‘First of all, me and my wife have been separated for over a year.
‘I think people just now are going “he’s a bad coach, he’s a bad husband, he’s a bad human.”’
Kirk has been in management and women’s football for the last 14 years. His CV includes Scottish Cup wins with Hibernian, an FA Cup final with Everton and promotion with Bristol City.
He first joined Leicester as their director of football in July 2022 but when the club sacked Lydia Bedford later that year, he agreed to take over. Leicester were bottom of the table with zero points after six games, but Kirk led them to a remarkable great escape.
It was in the months following this and after the new season had started that Kirk unexpectedly received an approach.
‘One of the players contacted me away from work to express their feelings for me,’ Kirk says. ‘I said “that is ridiculous” and just shut it down. That was that.’
Kirk says he rejected repeated advances over the coming months. I kept shutting it down and said “it’s never going to happen, there’s a code of conduct.”’
Things changed when the player picked up an injury at the end of last year. ‘I think this is what justified it to us,’ Kirk says.
Kirk took over his role after former head coach Lydia Bedford moved away from the Foxes
The former head coach said that he repeatedly rejected the advances of the player before she picked up an injury
‘She picked up an injury at the tail end of the calendar year and was doing her rehab away from the training ground.
‘Just before Christmas, I agreed to meet on a personal level. She was injured so it wasn’t going to stop me doing my job because she couldn’t be selected.
‘Obviously I was trying to justify it to myself, which never made it right. After Christmas we started seeing each other once a week, so she’d come here, or the week after I’d go to hers.’
Kirk knew the relationship was unethical. ‘We would arrive in the dark, we would leave in the dark, clearly because we knew it was wrong.
In the February international break, Kirk and his partner took a risk that proved pivotal. ‘I said I was going to go away for a few days to Milan. And she said “why do we not go away together?” I told her that was a step too far, but eventually we agreed to a few days away.
‘We convinced each other that we could do it. We flew out on different days and spent two nights in Italy then we got separate flights back.
‘When we came back, we said “I think this has gone too far, we need to knock this on the head until the end of the season and either I’ll leave the club or you’ll leave the club.”
‘We had agreed we were taking too much of a risk.’
What Kirk did not realise is that his relationship had been discovered by an official at another Women’s Super League club, who reported him to Leicester.
‘I got pulled into a meeting saying there had been a complaint made about me and the club lawyer would be in touch and the external lawyers would arrange an investigation.
‘Ten days came and went.
‘We were building up to the FA Cup game against Liverpool. Fifteen minutes before the last training session on the Friday, I got pulled into the office by the women’s director and the internal lawyer was there and I just knew what it was.
‘They said we need you to be honest with us “are you in a relationship with a player?” “We know all about it, we know you’ve been to Italy, we know it started just before Christmas.”’
First team assistant manager Jennifer Foster (pictured) has since taken over as interim coach
Kirk then admitted the relationship and, after a three-week investigation, was sacked for gross misconduct. Kirk unsuccessfully appealed the decision. The player remains at the club.
‘From admitting it, I was treated and felt like a criminal,’ Kirk says.
‘I feel the club could have dealt with it better. I felt there was a lack of consistency with previous investigations.
‘It’s on me, it’s my fault, I should never have gone through with anything. There is a code of conduct, I was involved with putting it in place, I was certainly involved with living by it on a day-to-day basis and trying to drive our standards, so it is absolutely ridiculous that I’m the one that’s broken it.
‘I think the way it was dealt with created a lot of uncertainty and rumours and counter-rumours.
‘I don’t think that helped the players or the staff and I think we’re now seeing that in results. They got through the Liverpool game but they’ve picked up two draws in the last seven games.
‘As difficult as it would have been, I felt I was due an audience with the staff and the players to explain myself and apologise face-to-face and to give my side of the story.
‘It might not have kept me there, but we’ll never know.’
Kirk is not asking for sympathy, but says it has been difficult not being able to give his side of the story.
Outgoing Chelsea head coach Emma Hayes said that she believes player-coach relationships are inappropriate
Kirk has shared that he felt ‘treated like a criminal’ during the investigation and said the club could have handled his exit better
‘It’s been frustrating. Wrongly, I think a lot of that frustration has turned into hate. I’ve hated myself. I hated the club. I’ve had moments where I have resented the relationship even though the relationship is still going on.
‘This wasn’t a manager exerting their power who said “jump into bed with me and I’ll play you in the starting XI.”
‘I’ve just carried this hate, which is wrong, but it’s come from this frustration of not being able to speak about it.
‘I’m not a criminal, I’ve not committed a crime. I’ve jeopardised an environment and that is a pretty big thing. The club made mistakes in the past, I came in, turned around a points gap that had never been turned around before, retained WSL status. Now I’ve made a mistake and they don’t want anything to do with me. I felt let down by the club in terms of that.’
Prior to his dismissal from Leicester, Kirk was regarded as one of the brightest managers in the WSL.
But there will be people who will argue he should never work in the women’s game again. Would he make the same mistake twice? Can he be trusted?
Kirk knows these are the questions people will ask. He would no doubt find it easier to get a job in men’s football, but it is in the women’s game where he has made his career – and he is determined not to give that up.
‘I worked very hard to get to a position where I was full-time in football.
‘I’ve stayed in the women’s game when I’ve had offers to go to the men’s game. I think I’ve played my part in trying to grow the game, the amount of players I’ve helped develop.
Before taking over at Leicester, Kirk managed Everton’s women’s side (pictured in 2019)
The ex-head coach has spoken of his desire to try and continue in the women’s game
‘It’s what I know. I’ve put so much energy into knowing the landscape, knowing the players worldwide. It would almost be like starting afresh in the men’s game. I just feel I need to try and stay in the women’s game because I’ve put so much into it. I don’t want to walk away from it.
‘After 14 years of building my reputation, for it to be destroyed by one mistake, I feel would be harsh. It is my mistake and I should never have put myself in that position and I regret making that decision.
‘I’m hoping that somebody is willing to see the good in me. I’m speaking to a couple of clubs outside the UK next week so hopefully something comes of that.
‘In the last five years in the WSL, outside the top four I’m the second most successful manager in terms of points per game. People will be worried about what’s happened, will it happen again? I’d like to think that in 14 years, one mistake is not something that’s going to be repeated.
‘I can’t be stubborn and not take a job in the men’s game if that’s the only thing going because I’ve got a three-year-old son and I’ve got bills to pay. But I am adamant I want to stay in the women’s game because of the work that I’ve done and I want to keep driving it forward.’
Kirk’s relationship cost him his job. So, it feels important to ask whether he regrets his actions.
‘I regret the timing of it and my decision to have a relationship with a current player.
‘It’s a line that we know, in elite level sport, should not be crossed. But we also know in everyday life it’s a line that gets crossed all the time. I think a lot of organisations acknowledge that a lot of relationships start in the workplace.
‘I certainly don’t regret the outcome of the relationship.’
As previously mentioned, Kirk is not the first manager to have had a relationship with one of his players. Kirk does not want to start throwing others under the bus, but does he feel as though he’s been made a scapegoat?
‘I suppose it feels like I’ve taken the hit for a lot of people, but at the end of the day, I’ve made a mistake and I’ve been punished for my mistake. I take responsibility for that.
Kirk wonders if he has been made a scapegoat, with other coaches in the game having also had relationships with players
He told Mail Sport that he regretted the timing of his actions but not the outcome of them
‘There is I suppose a little bit of frustration, there’s managers, there’s assistant managers, who have had relationships with players.
‘There’s managers who have had relationships with senior staff at clubs. There’s conflicts of interest all over the place. Do we need to clean the game up in terms of working backwards? I don’t know. But if we did, we’d have a lot of job vacancies, across all types of jobs within the game.
What’s acceptable and what’s unacceptable, it probably can be debated for a long time. I just know that I was in the wrong and I’ve been punished. I’ve just got to draw a line there.’
Kirk may not be the last manager to be sacked for a relationship with a player, but he wants others to learn from his mistakes.
‘I’m hoping what’s happened to me is a wake up call for everybody and a bit of a shock for anyone who is either doing it or somebody who is in that position. Then something good will have come from it.’
